Name: James Brown
Hobbies and Interests: Drums, Nintendo, Drinking/Smoking, Punk Shows
Appearance: James is average in height and just a little bit underweight for his age. He has little muscle mass to speak of. He never lets his light brown hair grow very long, but currently it appears it's time for a cut. He sports a scraggly honest abe which he can never seem to trim without making it look patchy and awful, so he rarely does. His eyes are a clear blue and he has a tendency to often appear rather blank because of this. His face is a little pockmarked. His usual attire consists of comfortable jeans, sneakers and t-shirts sporting his favorite prog bands. He started wearing contact lenses in highschool as well as a calculator watch which he never really uses to calculate anything. His posture sucks.
Biography: James' family moved to Highland Beach from Oakland when he was little. His father had been offered a big job opportunity and his mother (a librarian) had decided it was better to relocate than to have Mr Brown away all the time. James was having problems with a schoolyard bully anyway so he was all for it. He soon found out that bullies were everywhere in California but it was ok because there were much dorkier targets than him. He made a handful of friends through a mutual interest in the Ninja Turtles and spent a lot of time in gradeschool running around with them on the playground, calling himself Michelangelo and doing pretend battle with Shredder and April O'Neil (designated a villain because girls were stupid).
"Donatello" had a coveted Nintendo Entertainment System, and the four of them would often go over to his house to play it. It was a lot of fun, except whenever "Raphael" got mad because he'd lost and either went home or remained grumpy for the rest of the evening. James was blown away by all the 8-bit glory and became relentless in asking his parents for a Nintendo for his birthday (or maybe Christmas). He ended up having to wait a year though, seeing as his little brother Dave had just been born a few months ago and money was consequently rather tight. By then of course the Sega Genesis had arrived and his new game system was already dated, but this didn't bother James in the least because he wasn't allowed to play Mortal Kombat or Streetfighter anyway (too violent, said his parents). On top of that, he received a shoebox full of cartridges from his older cousin who had traded up and no longer cared for them. James became well-acquainted with Mario, Zelda, Megaman, and of course Battletoads (ludicrous as the idea was of fighting amphibians).
His parents came to decide he was playing too many videogames in his spare time, and told him to get a freaking hobby before he turned into a vegetable. So he did, and that hobby was playing the drums. The Browns would come to regret forcing that decision upon their son in the following years, although he ended up becoming very skilled at his instrument. During these transitional years it stopped being cool to play anything other than trading cards during recess, and eventually anything at all. "Leonardo" moved away, and the other three boys drifted apart slowly as they fell into other groups. James was spending more time on his drumkit, and began to broaden his horizons musically. Of course no one offered more interesting percussion than nu metal, and he became interested in that. Then later he decided that nu metal was kind of gay and moved on to more progressive groups that were harder to find but much more instrumentally complex. He felt there was a lot of musical value to it, even though to his parents it was all just noise. Also Nintendo 64 came out; that was pretty boss.
Highschool brought with it a bunch of kids who fancied themselves rockstars, and James would have been lying if he said he wasn't intrigued himself. He was showing off during music class one day and a casual friend who was learning the guitar asked if he would be interested in starting a rock band. They found a bass player and covered some songs, and although they didn't sound too great it was fun. They did get better anyway, and eventually decided to play at some of the humble punk shows organized at the local community center. He was surprised to become reacquainted with "Raphael", who'd fallen in with a group of sketchy delinquents and primarily went to the shows for the social scene. While their relationship remained superficial at best, he convinced James to try some weed, which became an occasional pastime along with hiding things from his rather strict parents. James discovered later that he was a bit of a lightweight when it came to alcohol and was very susceptible to the mind-altering effects of marijuana.
This year is going ok; James' band has begun writing originals (which need work) and while there are a few creative differences between the group they've managed to make it work, usually over a spliff or two. They've also recently recruited a keyboard player, which was his idea. He still has no idea what he's going to do after highschool, but he has decided to take a year off and work full time until he can make up his mind. The old NES has finally bit the dust it seems; he can only ever get a flashing green block out of it anymore.
Advantages: He is fairly intelligent and is not one to lose his cool very easily. He also has good hand-eye coordination.
Disadvantages: He is physically out of shape, and has poor eyesight without his glasses.
Designated Number: Male Student no. 13
The above biography is as written by CycoKiller. No edits or alterations to the author's original work have been made.
Designated Weapon: M1 Garand
Conclusions: Heh, not only a punk, but a LARPer too? I'll particularly enjoy watching this kid bite it. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate punks? Too bad his eyesight sucks, that renders the excellent garand we gave him more or less useless. Maybe someone who isn't a total waste of oxygen will pry it from his cold, dead, hands.
Game Evaluations Edit
Kills: Nicholas Nutbrown
Killed by: Alexis Machina
- "Right. How many lives do we have left?"
- "I thought you told me to stay black"
- "Fuck you, Kenny!"
- "Killer bees with the heads...of raccoons!!"
Below is a list of threads that contain James, in chronological order.
- In the Wake of the Bunt
- House of Boo
- The Legend of the Flower of Woe
- The Stench of Reality
- At a Loss
- Cause and Effect
- It Hurts
- There's a Moral In This Somewhere
- Birds Of a Feather Burn Together
- Match Point
- When There's Nothing Left to Burn
Your Thoughts Edit
Whether you were a fellow handler in SOTF or just an avid reader of the site, we'd like to know what you thought about James Brown. What did you like, or dislike, about the character? Let us know here!